Squid Caching Not Working

[m0lecule]

I'm having serious issues getting Squid Caching working on my network. This is really bumming me out :(

Network Setup:
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192.168.1.0/24 IP Scheme in the LAN

APU1D4 Firewall / Router with 4gb Ram and 32gb mSATA running pfSense 2.3.3-RELEASE-p1
[APU1D4 Connects to]
Dell Powerconnect 5324 Switch
[Powerconnect Leads to]
Various pieces of equipment (laptops, desktops, etc.) inside the LAN

pfSense Setup:
–-----------------
Running Squid version 0.4.36_2 along with Lightsquid version 3.0.6_2
Squid is using the LAN and loopback interfaces under General Settings, Transparent HTTP Proxy is on, logs are on and cycling every 30 days, under Local Cache I'm using heap LFUDA, also using 8000MB for HD caching and aufs, maximum object size is 1024 and min is 0, memory cache size is 2048, max objects in ram is 256 (default), memory replacement policy is LRU, Allowed subnets in the ACLs is 192.168.1.0/24, ACL safe ports is 80 443 and SSLPorts is 443 563

The Issue:

After setting up Squid I tested downloading files multiple times expecting the 2nd time to be astronomically faster. It wasn't. Download speeds remain the same no matter how many times I download the same exact file. These test downloads are within the 1024mb range set for maximum object size of course.

I then checked out the cache.log and access.log files. Strange things in the logs:
Cache.log says "pinger: Initialising ICMP pinger ..." a whole bunch of times
Access.log says "TCP_MISS/200" "TCP_MISS/204" "TCP_MISS/302" "TCP_MISS/304" and "TCP_MISS/400" a WHOLE BUNCH OF TIMES.

Can anyone help?