ok i got it working i did have that the "SSL/TLS + User Auth"
what i noticed i didnt notice before
for both site to site and remote access
the description is "openvpn remote access" i had for both..
i did not know that under Client Export under "Remote Access Server" it goes by description
and when i read it saying "openvpn remote access" thought i was fine.. when i clicked it i had 2 "openvpn remote access" i never knew that was "Description" and not name of the certificate...
i know if i used openvpn alot i wouldnt make mistakes like that....
too bad for newbs they didnt offer a little note under Client Export
under Remote Access Server.. Server name is from Description Name from Server Tab... or under the Servers.. when you write Description.. like it say "This will be Remote Access Server Name"
i never clued in at all till i found i had both desc same and that made the difference... didnt even know