My next venture is to learn more about debugging ALTQ so I can see more stats. I am assuming I will need to resort to a full FreeBSD to get more control of the system though. Learning more about FreeBSD is probably a good idea.
I bet that the bufferbloat/Codel mailing-list has some great info about how to simulate traffic for testing.
I have only played with netperf casually. The few worthwhile tests I ran I did with either multiple sessions of iperf, or multiple sessions of netcat/nc. Netcat is insanely powerful. Every few months since I learned of netcat I am amazed by how powerful the simple tool can be; "netcat host2 port < /dev/zero" to a listening netcat and bam, single stream TCP/UDP traffic. or send a file with the same method. or create a remote shell. That is just the standard uses.
There is gns3, but it is Cisco emulation primarily. Good userbase and polished interface.
There must be a good, simple simulator, right? Call DARPA maybe? ;)