Are you using pfSense CE or Plus? I think that is my first follow up question, Plus is supposed to have some more "stuff" in it to help with IPsec failover delays, as mentioned in the docs.
It's been a while since I've had to failover a node for testing so I could be remembering wrong but I think it was near instant failover. But the docs do mention it could take until the timeout of the tunnel if the peer is the one initiating.
Do you have dead peer detection enabled and do you know if the other side of the tunnel does? That should in theory cause the peer to initiate the tunnel again quickly.
Also, as far as I can tell, the backup node in the HA cluster should become an initiator when it's status changes to Master; I'm sure it is, but can you confirm (when in failover) that the primary says Backup and the secondary says Master? Just to be 100% sure that is working.
Finally, from what I am seeing, I think it should work just as well without XLMRPC so that's the good news.