Ashima has the fix. I tried a bunch of stuff to get this fixed AND NONE OF IT WORKED until I patched the boot loader!
https://wiki.freebsd.org/SystemTuning#SYSCTL_TUNING
"The kern.ipc.somaxconn sysctl limits the size of the listen queue for accepting new TCP connections. The default value of 128 is typically too low for robust handling of new connections in a heavily loaded web server environment. For such environments, we recommend increasing this value to 1024 or higher. The service daemon may itself limit the listen queue size (e.g. sendmail(8), apache) but will often have a directive in its configuration file to adjust the queue size up. Larger listen queues also do a better job of fending off denial of service attacks."
Thank you Ashima! I gave you a thank you bump too…if that matters, 5 gold stars, best in class, grade A <-- whatever nice things you can think of.
This was driving me friggin crazy!!! :-)